I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize
