my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize