U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
