Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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