she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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