Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
