The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Randomize
