I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Buhtt sex?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
You were trust falling into bushes
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
