Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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