Bisexual people are plain selfish.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
