garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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