Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
