Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
