i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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