Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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