Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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