# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
