i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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