I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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