Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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