she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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