im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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