Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
