does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have surprise drugs for everyone
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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