I wish my penis had an off switch
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
