do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
