How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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