I must be too annoying 4 u.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
