I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
