That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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