loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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