I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize