i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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