Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
