That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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