I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
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