So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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