remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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