Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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