is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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