Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
