i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
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I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
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I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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