Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I came so hard my ears popped.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
