Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
