The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
