To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize