I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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