I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
