i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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