I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
