PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Randomize
