I'm really into asian looking animals
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
